What?
There is no point being happy. Happiness only lasts only for so long. Misery loves company. It creeps onto you without warning and engulfs you. You struggle, manage to hang on to a ledge before you slip all the way down, but one by one, your fingers slip. Damn those sweat glands, damn life.Why did things happen this way? What is the key to eternal happiness? Why can't we have perfect information to make perfect decisions?
Why is it, that every time you hope, your disappointment is so vast that it leaves a big empty hole in your chest, your eyes brimmed with tears, your throat screaming in despair?
There is no point hoping. There is no point looking forward to the future. What do I see?
I see a girl who will graduate next year, in June 2011. Whatever her grades may be, it is not enough for the people of this world. Nobody is proud of her. She is not proud of herself. She did not get what she wanted the most. What is the point of being in a university if you are not happy? If your happiness only lasts for a moment? The ground starts slipping away again once you start to remember.
Juggling jobs, rushing from place to place, falling sick, trying to act as though she doesn't know anything, just so she can mask her true feelings, her true mature thoughts, which she only shows to those who deserve it.
She yearns for things that she dares not get. She knows she will not get, and she should not get.